SELF-OBIT: By Zeyad Masroor Khan


Zeyad Masroor Khan died with the manuscript of his third book glued to his chest as the assailants fired on him from their semi-automatic uzi machine guns. The Deep Purple record, the Quentin Tarantino DVD, the DC-Marvel crossover comic book and his political manifesto were strewn with the redness of his blood.

Born and brought up in a conservative Muslim family of Aligarh, Zeyad fell in love with comic books and developed a keen interest in reading. When he was a student, he developed a habit to question everything, a trait which didn’t go down well with his teachers, school administration and authorities in general. A loner by nature, he continuously tried to overcome his shy nature to become a people’s person.

Being a skeptic and having seen communal violence with his own eyes, he detached himself completely from religion during his college days.

Poverty dismayed him and he could never come to terms with the idea that people sleeping on roads, without bedding, food, clothing and toilet facilities was destiny. His utmost devotion to the ideas of equality and justice remained the hall mark of his sixty-seven years of existence on earth.

When he went into journalism after finishing studies, his intention was to represent the underdogs, the downtrodden, and the voiceless. As he realized this was not possible within the system, he left journalism in the summer of 2022 to start his own brand of political revolution.

The rest is history.

When he became India’s first Muslim Prime Minister in 2041 on a plank of humanism and rationalism, many derided his victory as a flash in the pot and a result of people’s anger against the rampant communalism, casteism, economic and class divide prevalent at that time.

However, as his policies of investing on education and healthcare began to reap benefits and led to complete eradication of poverty, even his critics altered their evaluation. His economic policies and exemplary work in making Indian masses sensitive to gender equality and LGBT rights was extensively studied by social scientists and altered to effectively implement it in the Middle East and sub-Saharan Africa.

His books, documentaries and memes are currently under literary scrutiny by critics for understanding the subaltern subtexts.

Though widely regarded as a pacifist for solving the Kashmir and Naxalite disputes through extensive focus on engagement and dialogue, his role as a war general was widely praised during the Moradabad alien invasion of the 2050s.

It is only fitting that his assassination at the hands of extra-terrestrial assailants will be marked by a state mourning of three days and his memorial named as “the beacon”.zeyad.png

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